18 weeks

Monday, November 8, 2010


I've noticed that my weekly preggo e-newsletters are not unlike the 24 news hour cycle. There's not really much to say about week 18 - they are the size of a bell pepper! The might be sucking their thumb! So they do their best to throw out some kind of carrot on a stick to keep you checking back. And while this tidbit was mentioned awhile back, it was folded back into this week's missive and didn't fail to snag my attention:

Your dreams are about to get F-ed up.

As a grizzled veteran of freaky ass dreams, I actually perked up at this news. My dreams are, quite simply, awesome. So the thought that they were about to get awesomer? Sadly, it's the silver lining I need to get through my current mishmash of tapering blues, sciatic nerve pain, and an unyielding craving for the worst food on the planet.

And right on target, the extra HGC in my body delivered. Saturday was the tale of a a Javanese girl who ran around the island barefoot and mostly clothed to her proper mother's chagrin. The girl is devastated when she learns that she has been promised in marriage to her violent cousin who has made a fortune by rising through the ranks of the local mob. She despairs until she realizes she does have a choice. She informs her mother that she wishes to take possession of the family's ceremonial wedding gown, a decision that thrills the mother until she realizes her daughter's true intention: she will drown herself in the attempt to swim up the island's largest waterfall - an act that local legend says will deliver the person's soul to a new body to start over. And the cinematographer of my dreams deserves an Oscar for the death scene.

Last night was a perennial fave - zombies. It was all the fault of some punk Hollywood director who was shooting a zombie movie and got involved in some bad voodoo that sparked the real Zombie apocalypse. I learned of the truth inside a Halloween costume shop, when the zombie "costumes" lurched to life. Fortunately for me, I had a copy of my book club book and I neatly dispatched of one zombie after several blows to the head.

All this to say that I'm pleased to see I'm right on schedule.


Post a Comment