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Sunday, April 17, 2011

There's a conversation Caleb and I had that I replay over and over in my head. We'd had one of our numerous "should we/shouldn't we have another kid" discussions and almost in passing he said, "It's not like there's some kid that's just waiting on us to be born."

In that moment, right or wrong, I absolutely believed that there was.

Not long afterwards, just out of the shower, I remember pausing in my closet and urgently needing to have a conversation with said baby.

Things are good, I told him. (I said him because I felt like I was addressing the son I wondered if I was fated to parent.)

I like my life. I like this threesome. Things are good. Why invite change?

So if you are going to show up, I told him, it needs to be soon. Really soon before I lose my courage and close this door forever.

I got pregnant that night.

And 10 months later, he's finally here and so, so worth it.

Declan Grey Sweazy, meet the world.

Nana's grandson

photo by Nana

9 comments:

  1. He's so beautiful! Congratulations!!!

    I felt the same way about our threesome, except that my parents were both lonely only children (though I don't think all onlies are lonely) and so it was a given we would have more.

    I love that transition of loving the one so intensely to loving two with just as much feeling in the reservoir for both ... it is a feeling one can only have and not describe perfectly to others.

    Congratulations to all of you!

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  2. Félicitations! I have been checking my Reader for days hoping for this post. He really is beautiful.
    Can you please describe how to pronounce Declan's name correctly? Is it /dee-klahn/ or /dik-lahn/ or /deh-klan/ or something else still?
    Profitez de ces jours avec votre nouveau cadeau, tout beau.

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  3. Huge Congratulations and well done! Enjoy it - all! Lovely pic too

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  4. Thank you thank you! And vls - it's pronounced DECK-lan, though I'm given to calling my little string bean Slim :)

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  5. I love him so much. I must hold him!

    Also, he and Jiro can bond over no one knowing how to pronounce their names. (I already straightened Warren out, who was going with dee-klahn.

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  6. Congratulations!
    And Willkommen little Declan!!
    May your life be full of wonders!

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  7. Congratulations, Melissa! He is lovely!

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  8. welcome, declan! you lucky little baby! congratulations to you all! he is nothing short of perfect. enjoy. xx

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