Day in the Life

Sunday, September 1, 2013

6:30 On the dot. Declan sounds the wake up call, which is butt against door +1000x until the one of us with eyelids less glued together goes to retrieve him. But he's got stuff to do, man. Like a mean Jack Johnson cover before breakfast. He's also working on some originals, like the Ballad of My LongAss Toes.

8:30 I'm already on Pinterest. Declan is getting a new big boy bed, built by his daddy. Harlow has decided she's getting a new one...and it will be a Day of the Dead theme. I'm am simultaneously thrilled and convinced that no friend will ever EVER want to spend the night with her again in the big pink skull head of death bed. Maybe its for the best as it will give her plenty of space to write sulky poems in her journal.

9:45 She spots this dead body. There will be much googleage later, and we will learn that its the Polyphemus moth, named in for its Cyclops eye on its wings. She will later declare this moth to be her favorite, because its wings look like motherf*ckin SNAKES. Nature gave me a birthmark to ward off predators. I feel cheated.

10 AM Rainbow Lake playground for Opera Memphis's performance of the Playground King. Harlow tells me that she's not really into opera.

10:20 She is totally into opera.

12:30 D is put down for his nap/butt drum practice against the bedroom door.

12:45 For some reason we talk about Nellie Bly, my favorite female action hero from the 19th century America. Really, she was a pioneer undercover journalist who faked being crazy to gain access to a mental institution and wrote scathing articles about the abuse she witnessed. I KNOW, right? And she had an imaginary penguin or cat with her. At least, that's what I remembered from the Value Tales version. She was rock start level cool to me when I first learned about her. But hold up.  I mean why did she have to fake being crazy when she routinely talked to an imaginary penguin?

I dream about creating an interactive graphic novel/ iPad app so kids can learn her story. And then I totally forget about that other thing she did, the whole, "I'm going to see if I can travel around the world just like Phileas Fogg in 80 days or less" and then DOES.  And then it turns out there was another female journalist whom a rival paper sent out in the opposite direction to try and beat Bly and Harlow is like, "read it to me, mom!" and I'm all mmmm uh huh and she's like, I'm gonna play Stickman on the iPad now and I'm "Ok mmmwhatever teachable moment gone........

2:00 I somehow trick her into watching a nature documentary about cicadas instead of Phineas and Ferb. Because the weather has inexplicably cooled to less than 10,000 degrees,  we go outside and count 27 dead cicada husks in the yard. She's convinced it is a world record. I don't have the heart to tell her that we are likely standing on top of half a million in our yard alone.

3:00 What has steamrollers and Day of the Dead art? An art activity sure to appeal to both of my kiddos! We watch a group of artists and volunteers ink a giant woodblock carving and then drive a steamroller over it to make prints. Declan thinks this is awesome, and two seconds later, he is running down the street because that is awesomer. Harlow is bored because they just keep doing the same print of someone's legs over and over. Caleb and I wonder why we ever bother leaving the house.

Witching Hour(s): dinner, drinking, more screaming, Declan putting coins, marker tops, and plastic in his mouth and then hitting whichever parent tries to dig it out. Harlow disappears briefly and reappears to sing an opera she has composed in honor of her daddy. It has something to do with hats and it is adorable.

And bath and more screaming and then blessed bedtime where he soothes himself by hitting the door with his butt for about 55 minutes.

9 PM Don't tarot tipsy. Encourages the spirits to mess with you.

11 PM Procrastinate so badly you actually start BLOGGING again

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